Dear Volkswagen.
I'm sorry. I take everything back.
Yours apologetically,
stuzbot
My new LSV arrived today and I've just spent a couple of hours wrestling with the old one, trying to get it off. Boy! I don't think I've never been so pleased in my life when 'Rain stopped play' and I had to retire to the pavilion.
I used to regularly return to the house, after working on my VWs, covered in oil and swearing that they were Germany's revenge for losing the war. But, after tackling that LSV, I'm beginning to think that the Japanese reputation for cruelty is even more well-deserved.
Jeebus! --could you have designed a more wall-head-buttingly frustrating piece of kit to dismantle, if you'd tried?
* three delicate brake pipes attached, one of which is hidden from view
* two bolts holding the LSV to its bracket where the tops are hidden from view and the bolts free to spin
* bracket itself held on with two bolts also hidden from view
* fuel tank in the way of getting access on one side
* chassis rail getting in the way of access from the other side
* rubber boot and swing arm of LSV getting in the way from underneath
* no access from above
And then, for good measure:
* make sure all nuts and bolts are made of cheese
* encrust the whole area with 20 years of corrosion
And, although I admit this will doubtless be down to the aforementioned corrosion:
* make all the nuts a slightly annoyingly unusual size which seems to lie somewhere between 11mm and 12mm.
This last one was a real pisser. Back when I arrived home in the Land Cruiser after buying it, one of my neighbours came up to me and said
"Oh. You've gone Japanese this time" [I'd previously had 3 VWs in a row].
"Yep!" I replied handsomely and then added
"At least all my spanners will still fit!"
You can practically dismantle an entire VW with 9mm, 13mm and 17mm spanners. And I have so many decent quality spanners, sockets, etc in those sizes built up over the years. Then, I get working on my Land Cruiser and find those sneaky Japanese have decided to make everything 11mm or 12mm instead. Sizes which seem to be strangely rare amongst all my tools. Obviously the Axis powers bought one set of spanners before the war and then divvied it up between them.
So many spanners & sockets. So few the right size!
Anyway, I digress.
After two hours wrestling today, I have managed to:
* remove one bolt on the LSV bracket [which didn't actually seem to serve any purpose]
* loosen one visible brake line without breaking it
* dismantle the swingy arm on the LSV to try and get better access
* round off the other visible brake line nut
* turn one of the nuts holding the LSV to the bracket --only to find it was actually spinning the unseen head of the bolt as well
* round off the other nut holding the LSV to the bracket
* fail to turn the slightly visible bolt holding the bracket to the chassis, due to lack of access
* try to split the nuts on the LSV holding it to the bracket with my smallest nut splitter... only to find it wasn't quite small enough, so it just slid off, mangling the nuts and the ends of the bolts
* decide I needed to get my Dremel wannabe and cut the nuts off, which involves trailing my 10m extension lead down from my 1st floor flat and across the carpark
* crawl out from under the motor to go and fetch it and find it had started spitting with rain
I've got to say, I think I've had days were I felt slightly more sense of achievement!
I do love an inaccessible rusted solid bolt or five!
The sum total of two hours attempted dismantling today
PS: Does anyone have a part number for the three brake lines which run into the LSV? I'd say the chances of me removing them without cracking them is less than zero. And they're so crusty, I should replace them anyway. It's hard to tell where they go, as they disappear up above the suspension mounting. But it looks like they might be the same lines as emerge and run about halfway forward along the chassis rail, where there are joins.
I'm just wondering whether it would work out cheaper [in both time and money] for me just to buy the lines, rather than fork out for flaring tool, pipe cutter, pipe bender, etc.... although buying all the tools would have the advantage of allowing me to make up other pipes in future.