Jokes

[Michael Montgomery]

 

[Michael Montgomery]

Thanks everyone for your concern.
First off, I’m ok, I was a bit shaken up though.
For those of you that aren’t aware, I was robbed at Tesco’s petrol station earlier this morning. After my hands stopped trembling, I managed to call the police.
They were quick to respond and calmed me down because my blood pressure went through the roof!
My money was gone however

The police asked if I knew who did it and I told them,
“Yes, it was pump number 2”
Currently sitting in a cell for wasting police time

 

[SteveJB]

Q Why are all female maths teachers nice


A Because kids don't do sums for bi7ches

 

[Michael Montgomery]

 

[Michael Montgomery]

 

[Michael Montgomery]

 

[Michael Montgomery]

 

[Michael Montgomery]

 

[Michael Montgomery]

 

[Towpack]

 

[Towpack]

 

[AndycruiserguyLomas]

 

[Towpack]

We've just had a guy in to do some decorating and it turns out he used to be a pilot. He's made a great job of the landing!

 

[Surfy]

 

[AndycruiserguyLomas]

 

[Howmanygoes]

Why did the transgender man only eat salad? Because he was a her before!

 

[stumog]

 

[Towpack]

 

[AndycruiserguyLomas]

 

[AndycruiserguyLomas]

What do you call a cowboy who goes to an auction and buys nothing
Killy the bid
I’ll let myself out